sweet spirit

what entrancing music you make
your voice is that of angels singing
it wafts among the trees
and settles in my soul
hypnotizing
harmonizing
tantalizing

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Nosy neighbors

Nosy neighbors at the door
What do you think you're looking for?
Why must you always sneak and peek?
Can I not have but a moment's peace?
Stop this now or one thing's for sure
You'll see much more that you bargained for.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Hurt

Sometimes, you just can't say it any better than someone else already has...



I hurt myself today
to see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
the only thing that's real
the needle tears a hole
the old familiar sting
try to kill it all away
but I remember everything

what have I become?
my sweetest friend
everyone I know
goes away in the end
and you could have it all
my empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

I wear this crown of thorns
upon my liar's chair
full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
beneath the stains of time
the feelings disappear
you are someone else
I am still right here

what have I become?
my sweetest friend
everyone I know
goes away in the end
and you could have it all
my empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

if I could start again
a million miles away
I would keep mysel
fI would find a way...

Es mi vida...

I have what I have and I've got what I've got;
It is what it is and it's not what it's not.
I followed your rules and I followed your law
And I've nothing to show for it, nothing at all.
So here is my new rule, new law, and new creed:
I am who I am - you can like it or leave!

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

On Writing...

Here's my weekly update on what I've got:

1. Wilderness - Well the rough draft is finally finished and came in right around 75k words. The good news is that the first 2/3 of the draft, I was editing pretty heavily as I went, so it's more like a 2nd or 3rd draft. The bad news is I didn't edit the last 1/3 at all...I just wrote. So I'm sure there'll be alot of cleaning up to do on that part.
   
   75,000 words - Rough draft completed
   
   
2. Legacy - I have taken Arendiwanen, Nightmare and PKJ and combined them, since they were essentially the same story told from three different viewpoints. I'm having to do alot of whittling on the writing I already have to make them fit together, so the word count probably won't rise much at first...I'll have to rewrite alot of it. For now, I'm just going to go with the combined word count for the three.
   
   14,000+ words
   
   
3. Flashback - I still like the premise of this one. But I can't seem to figure where it should go from where I'm at. It looks like this one might be shelved for a time...
   
   2,000+ words - no change
   
   
4. Surviving - I know I said that I shelved this one. The content is a little hard for me to deal with, but I'm thinking if I don't deal with it now, I never will. So, to hell with it, I'm pulling it off the shelf.
   
   just under 3,000 words

So, I guess that's where I'm at. I have a feeling that I'll be working on Legacy mostly and jumping to Surviving if I need a break.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Snow

I have felt the cold wind;
I have seen the snows flying.
Winter is coming far sooner
Than you could ever imagine.
And you have done nothing to prepare.
Do you expect to find shelter
Simply because you are lost and pathetic?
Do you expect to ignore the love that is offered to you
Until the last moment,
And then run to it as a last resort?
The winter will be cold and deep;
The snow will pile high upon this earth;
And the only place you will find refuge
Is with the one you have turned your back on.
And oh, how you will cry
If he turns his back on you.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Unworthy

With all the darkness that courses through my veins,
With all the misery I have caused and known,
How can they look to me for guidance?
With all the sins I have committed,
And the thousand more that I have considered,
How can they ask me to teach them?
If they could see the dark secrets
That hide in my heart,
Perhaps they would understand.
Though I may see
I am blind.
Though I may hear
I am deaf.
And I am far too lost
To show them the way.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Midnight

Twilight caresses our shadows
The moon gives silent witness
The stars glow with anticipation
A memory surrounds the darkness
And love's power rules

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

My Pack

How it warms my heart and fills my day with happiness
When I awake and you hear the first sounds of my stirring
And come running to the bed, like a little herd of elephants
To kiss my eyes and lick my face and nose,
To bat my cheek and shake the bed with your wagging tail
With meows to show how pitifully you need my immediate attention
And whines to show how hard you're trying not to bark for joy
As if you'd been alone for years, instead of a mere few hours
As if nothing in the world has ever made you happier
Than to know that I'm still here
And though it warms my heart, it also makes me sad
That no one else has ever made me feel so loved

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Devotion

Yes, I love him
I don't care how foolish or witless
They may think it is
I have always loved him
From the first
Moment,
Look,
Word,
Touch.
He is now and has always been
My life
And the truest happiness is in being
His wife.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

On Writing...

Woo-hoooooo!!!!!!! It's DONE! DONE! DONE!!!!

*runs around the room screaming and holding up the finished manuscript*

DONE!!! DONE!!! DONE!!!! I FINISHED IT!!!!! WILDERNESS IS DONE!!!!

*runs around in circles*

*collapses from too much coffee and too little sleep*

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

untitled

If I could tell you what I see
Without fearing reprecussions,
I would tell you that
The one you pine for, the one you believe
Doesn't see you that way,
He doesn't just want to be friends.
He's only waiting until he finishes
What he's started,
Before he begins something else.
He'll tell you how he feels soon enough,
And you will have the children you long for...
In a little town in Illinois
You'll find the happiness you desire.
And the end you resist so strongly
Is not coming nearly as quickly as you fear
Nor half so painfully as you dread.
But I don't suppose you'd believe me
Even if I dared to speak.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

For The Record...

There are many different
Correct answers
To that question.
But laughter
Is never one of them.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Cravings

Why is it
You're never hungry
Till that damn
Pizza commercial
Comes on?
And even though
You know
The pizza place
Is closed,
Nothing else
In the house
Looks good
At all.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

I hate the Pizza Hut commercials. I think they put them on after the restaurants close on purpose...just to screw with us...

My Only One

Call my name and I will be there
No matter what stormy raging sea I must cross
No matter what steep and rugged mountain I must climb
No matter what dark and deadly valley I must brave
Call my name and I will be there
Whisper my name and I will come
For you are now and forever
My only one.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

OMG...did I actually just write something...that isn't depressing...and yet still doesn't suck completely...wow...lol

Glory Road

As I walk through this world of sorrow
I have no friends, nowhere to turn
The road leads on and so I follow
Hoping to find what I cannot earn

Oh, lead me on, oh, glory road
Help me to find my way back home
Walk by my side and hold me close
And lead me on Your glory road

I know the road is straight and narrow,
Though many try, so many stray,
Oh, Lord I'd leave this world tomorrow
If I could only see Your face.

Oh, lead me on, oh, glory road
Help me to find my way back home
Walk by my side and hold me close
And lead me on Your glory road

When morning light seems too long coming
And the night is dark and deep
I trust in You to keep me going
For You never leave Your sheep

Oh, lead me on, oh, glory road
Help me to find my way back home
Walk by my side and hold me close
And lead me on Your glory road
.
You hold me close and walk by my side
You still my fears and calm my mind
You washed me clean, as white as snow
And set me on this glory road

Oh, lead me on, oh, glory road
Help me to find my way back home
Walk by my side and hold me close
And lead me on Your glory road

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Written in the spring of 08. Another one that I'm not able to write the music to, which sucks because I know exactly how it should sound.

I'm Going Home

I walked into the old man's room
It was gloomy and dark
He lay on an old beat up bed
Victim of an old heart
I sat on the bed beside him
He put his hand in mine
The old eyes looked up at me
He said listen well my child

Someday you will see
And someday you will know
Why I no longer have any fears
Because I'm going home
There's kingdom in the clouds
Where the streets are paved with gold
And there's a crystal sea a-shinin'
Or so I have been told

He said, "I'm going home
There's a band of angels comin' to take me away"
He said, "I'm going home
And hopefully I'll see you, join me there someday"

Then the old man began to shiver
And his eyes seemed to fill with age
But even with his final breath
There was a smile on his face

And now I'm going home
There's a band of angels comin' to take me away
Yes, I'm going home
And you know, I'm gonna see him; I'll join him there today

Because I'm going home....

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

I lost the original writing of this one, so I'm not sure of the date, other than that it was somewhere around 93. It was inspired by the death of my step-grandfather, but it really encompasses the attitude of so many that I've known who have passed on. I wish that I could write the music that I hear in my head for it, but I'm just not that good. LOL

plagiarism

i write you poems to show my love
but then i hide them from you
and i know it may not make sense to others
i don't do it because i fear your reaction
i'm sure you would at least
pretend to like them
i don't do it because i fear
you'll misunderstand my words
i could always explain myself
and make you see what i meant
i hide my poems from you
because no matter how much i trust you
i can never forget
hearing my hard found words of love
falling from your lips
to her ears

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Well, hell...I was in a good mood. I really thought I was over that one...*sigh*

Our Song

You said you knew you didn't tell me
You loved me nearly enough.
And you knew that you couldn't write me
Sweet and lovely poems.
And you knew you didn't always show me
How important I was to you.
But...
What you didn't always say,
You thought every day.
What you couldn't ever write
You felt in your heart.
And though you didn't always show it,
You knew that it was true.
And I thought of the day,
You admitted
With a trace of embarrassment
That you made fun of those
Sappy love songs
Because they never made sense to you
Until I came along
And Fate skipped a beat
And scared you to death.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Upward Exit

He doesn't answer when I call;
And I worry.
He doesn't reply to my emails;
And I worry.
He may only be ignoring me
For some imagined slight.
But I worry somehow
That something isn't right.
For years ago, they told me
Something I'd rather not know.
I may not know the day;
But I do know the road...
I may not know the hour;
But I do know the result...
And though I tried to tell him
He simply won't believe;
And so I simply wait and worry
And wish I hadn't seen.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Lifted Up

I remembered you in my prayers.
I don't know you well,
Not really at all.
But I cried when I thought
Of how you hurt.
I didn't cause your pain,
But I have caused the same pain
For others.
And so,
I prayed for you.
I prayed for
Comfort,
Strength,
And healing.
I prayed that someday soon,
When you're ready,
That true love will find you.
That you will find the happiness
That I know you deserve.
I prayed that you will be patient
And wait -
That the pain you feel now,
Is only
Preparing you
For better things.
I remembered you in my prayers
Because
I've caused the pain you feel;
I've felt the pain you feel.
But also because
I know that sometimes
It just isn't meant to be
No matter how badly
You wanted it.
I know that sometimes
Destiny
Denies you what you want
To give you what you need.
And it's far better.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Run Away...

Let's run away together.
Just pack our bags and leave;
We'll drive south,
Following summer's dwindling trail.
We'll find a sandy beach
Where the sun shines warm
All year long.
And a cozy little cottage
Where the whispering roar of the waves
Can rock us to sleep.
We'll leave our cares and worries
To freeze in winter's grip.
We'll live for ourselves
And no one else.
And when they come looking for us,
We'll run away and hide;
Laugh at their confusion.
Because they don't understand
How little we need them
And how much we need
Each other.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

On Writing...

Well, it's been a week now. So, here's my working list:

1. Wilderness
   9/16 - 63,000+ words
   9/23 - 69,000+ words
   6,ooo words
   
2. Nightmare
   9/16 - 2,000+ words
   9/23 - 3,700 words
   1,700 words

I haven’t worked on the other stories at all this week…although I have read over them and contemplated some plot stuff.

I do know that this was not a lot of writing…but to be fair, I was sick a few days. I also had to do some rewriting, well, actually I backed up in Wilderness and started writing in a new direction…so, if I removed 5,000 words that were in the original count…that means I actually wrote about 12,000 words. Still not impressive (considering that I have little else to do with my life at the moment), but considering the time I wasted on plot problems in Wilderness…I guess it’ll do. Besides, even at this rate, I would think that I could still finish the rough draft of Wilderness in a month at most. Two weeks if I’d get off my ass and quit playing video games. LOL

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Love

I love you, you know.
You're an ass sometimes.
You ignore me for hours on end,
You tease me unmercifully,
You blame me for things
Beyond my control.
But other times,
You're the sweetest guy
I've ever known;
Thoughtful,
Kind,
Adoring.
And I know
You love me
In your own way.
But do you know
How much I love you?

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

in the shadows

i looked into the darkness
and i saw
the eagle
one head looked to the sun
one head looked to the moon
it held a scimitar
it fed on others
smaller than itself
and then
it saw the star
and rage filled its heart
it rained down fire on the land
and judgment began

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Heart of Hearts

You are the greatest temptation
I have ever known,
And even when my mind says
I should turn away from you
I cannot.
A look,
A smile,
A touch,
And I am yours again.
What chains you've
Wrapped around me.
What a wicked spell you weave.
You've made me such a
Lovesick fool.
My mind is not my own.
I only think straight when
You're not around.
But when you're near
And I can feel your touch,
I am no more than
Your slave.
If loving you were
A sin,
I still couldn't help myself.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

the only one

sometimes i wonder
if i'm the only one
who feels like
they're going crazy
if i'm the only one
who feels like
life's too hard
if i'm the only one
who feels like
they're worthless
if i'm the only one
who feels like
time's not on my side
if i'm the only one
who feels like
they're lost

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

apology

oh my love
i'm sorry

i know it's not

your fault
i don't know
why i say such things
too late now
to take it back
too late to say
i'm sorry
but i'll say it
anyway

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

the tall men

why do you come to me
only in the silence?
why do you never
show your faces?
i have tried to look
upon your face.
but my eyes slide away.
i have tried to understand
your words
but my mind cannot hear
the words you say.
those words that i knew
in another life.
did you really think
I would believe you angels?
and not know you
for what you
really are?
did you really think
i never studied
the old ways?
and never heard your name?
did you think
i would trust you
just because
you showed me the truth?
even the morning star
knew the truth.
even evil knows the truth.
what can you show me
that I do not already know?
what can you give me
that another cannot?
i know what you really are.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

untitled

it's no wonder that the shadow dwellers have been stalking
and that the tall men have been walking
with all that's unfolding
its frankly amazing
that i've slept at all
no, i haven't lost my faith
i just set it aside
(as i have often done)
until i can unravel in my mind what i heard
and decide if i can live with it
or if he finally pushed the line
too far
give me a few days
and i'll pick it back up again
but for now
the thoughts running through my mind
make it hard to be a christian
and the tall men
say it's not over
who am i to argue
with them?
so i listen
when they say to wait
when they say
he will show
his true colors soon
explore and learn, he says
but he is not facing them
talk to them, she says
but she is not facing
these things that whisper truth
yet hide from sight

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Another one that I'm not sure why I didn't publish...September 08

How many times can
A person be hurt
Before they turn back
To the old ways
They once knew?
Before they once again
Become
Unfeeling,
Uncaring.
And whisper the words
They long ago denied?
Before they become
What they so long ignored?
Didn't I ever tell you
What happens
To those
Who hurt me?
You should have listened to me.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Vision

I saw the truth...
I saw beyond the stars...
I saw what others
Could not,
Would not,
See.
I saw what was beyond...
And somehow,
It made sense
That it was
Nothing.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

From A Distance

I guess my writing makes it
Easy to see
From the outside.
And so removed...
I wonder
Which is sadder?
The fact that I'm so desperate?
Or
The fact that you don't see it?

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

No More...

I just wonder
What you'd think,
If you knew,
How many times
I regretted
Making that promise.
I really do love you...
But I really don't want
To be here anymore...
It just
Hurts too much.
I'm sorry.
But you shouldn't
Worry too much.
I was never
That brave
Anyway.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Lust...

Okay, you know I love you,
Right?
And that I'd never leave you,
Right?
I'd never cheat on you.
Honestly.
But seriously,
Between you and me,
If I heard that car outside
And he walked through the door,
What could I say
But
Paul who?

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Okay, private joke, a free pass kind of thing. If you don't get it, don't ask. LOL But if you're a visitor and you're curious...http://i135.photobucket.com/albums/q130/jMi_Jaded/Jensen%20Ackles/DeanImpalaSmirk-1.jpg *drools on page* Sorry....LOL

Shadows

lock your doors
and stay inside tonight
for the night is dark and deep
and you have no idea
what lurks in the shadows
what peers in
through your windows
what watches you
as you walk
through your
brightly lit house
you have no idea what waits
with endless hunger
for you to step outside
lock your doors
and stay inside
the shadows have come alive
and they want
your heart

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Broken

Damnit.
Everything keeps coming out
Wrong today.
I hate to feel
So out of sorts.
So off balance.
I hate these days.
They're so hard to
Fight through.
And it's almost not worth
Getting out of bed,
Or even breathing.
And all I want is
To cry until
It doesn't hurt anymore.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Time

Eleven years is a long time
To know someone,
To love someone,
And still not trust them;
Still not know the little things,
Like my favorite song,
My favorite book;
To still not understand
That sometimes I will be sad
No matter what you do;
And sometimes I will laugh
No matter how mad it makes you.

It's a long time to know me
And yet still not understand,
That no matter what you say or do,
There will always be times
That I must be alone.
There will always be places
Where you cannot follow.

Eleven years is a long time
Much too long
For me to ever expect
For you to change.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

An Old Friend...

That song came on the radio;
The one that always make me
Remember you.
And I wonder again,
If I'd been in the car...
If I'd gone that day...
Would you still have
Been playing around?
Would you still have
Been going so fast?
Or would you
Have slowed down?
Not wanting to scare me?
Would you have been
Watching the road
Because you cared more about your friends
Than you ever did yourself?
Everyone else says
It's just lucky I wasn't with you.
But I know better...

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Breakdown

it hurts so much to remember
and it's all in a fog anyway...
yes, i know that i knew her,
and that i should remember him...
but it's all so fuzzy
in my mind...
i know everyone thinks
i'm getting old
before my time...
they make jokes and
laugh about it...
i can't put the names
to faces anymore...
i can't recall if
we were friends
or enemies
anymore...
i've forgotten
so much more
than i realized...
and i wonder if they
would still laugh about it
if they knew why...
it's so hard to
think straight
after
you've been broken...

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Reconsidered

I looked in the mirror
This morning
Really looked
And for the first time
In a long time,
I liked what I saw.

I looked in your
Eyes today
I looked into your soul
And for the first time
In a long time,
There were no suspicions.

I thought about my life
About what I wanted
And what I had
And for the first time
In a long time,
I was happy with it.

I looked in the mirror
This morning
Really looked
And for the first time
In a long time,
I liked what I saw.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

True Friends

you make me admit things
i'd rather pretend weren't
you make me look at things
i'd rather ignore
you make me keep my word
when i'd rather be lazy
you make me feel guilty
for not writing enough
knowing you're reading
makes me think about
what i'm writing
there's no coasting
with you around
you remind me of the truth
when lying would be much easier
you make me wonder
what i could do
you make me remember
who i really am
so, in case i forgot
thank you

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

This was originally two poems for two different people. But it sounds better melded together. Et, voila.

My Enemy

i know it shouldn't amuse me
to hear of your difficulties
but you destroyed my life once
and so
i can't help the sadistic streak
that rears its head
the little voice in my mind
that laughs
when i hear
about your car wreck
when i find out
you have lupus
when they talk about
your strokes
how your husband left you
and your children hate you
and that bus that hit you?
that one was priceless
i know it's cruel and petty
but did you really think
that you could hurt me
like you did
and not pay for it?
ah, but i guess
people like you
never learn

© 1991-2008 Samantha Greene

Mon Pere

I just wondered if you
Had forgotten me.
You haven't called in
Quite a while.
Is your new family
That much better?
Doesn't it count
That I'm the only blood you have?
Doesn't it count
That I love you?
You don't reply to
My letters.
You don't answer
My phone calls.
Are you forgetting me?
Or ignoring me?
I don't guess it matters.
I'm used to being forgotten.
I just wish
You'd give me the courtesy
Of an excuse.
I guess you're too busy.
I wish I didn't care so much.
But I do love you.
And I miss you.
I wish you'd call.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Credo Novus

I believe in the Father
In the Son
And in the Holy Ghost.

I believe all things come from above
But are often distorted here below.

I believe all things are good
Until humans pervert them.

I believe we all are meant for greatness
Though few of us achieve it.

I believe love heals all wounds
Even though it's often the cause.

I believe some things are never meant to be said
And some things were never meant to be hidden.

I believe we are unworthy for all we receive
But should be grateful beyond measure for what we have.

I believe tomorrow
Can be better than today.

I believe none of us are perfect
But we are all worth saving.

I believe my life was written
Long before I was born.

I believe a time will come when we all
Will be held accountable.

And I believe that on that day,
I will have someone to speak for me.

I believe in The Word
Both written and living.

And I believe He will always love me
No matter how little I deserve it.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Waxing Philisophical

A friend asked
"If you could be
Anyone at all
Who would you be?"

I thought a moment,
About power,
About wealth,
Fame and fortune,
And all the possibilities.

But in the end,
I finally answered,
"Myself."

My life may not be perfect.
But it is mine.
And I say,
Better the devil you do know.

I'm not sure he believed me...

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Arendiwanen

The Tall Men are walking again.
The Shadow Dwellers are becoming braver.
They feed on fear and uncertainty,
but I fear them not.
The fearsome faces they show
are only masks
to hide their weaknesses.
Begone False Face;
Begone Shadow Dweller.
I walk with the Tall Men.
And you have no power here.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Made Me Think

No, this isn't poetry. And no, you don't have to get it. It's enough that it speaks to me.

"You see, everyone thinks it sounds like fun – a game you can play at parties, a way of entertaining other people and maybe even yourself. But they’re forgetting one important thing about it. This is not a crystal ball; you have no control over it. You can’t choose what you see, you can’t choose how you see it, you can’t even choose when you see it. The dreaming may come at night…or it may come in the middle of the day when you’re talking to your boss or driving your car. The point is that you don’t know and fighting it is almost impossible. You can try, but in the end, the dreaming will own you. It will eat your heart and soul for breakfast and still want more..."

-Morgan, "Legacy"

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Steven

I was looking through some old things.
Pictures,
Letters,
Cards.
And I saw your letter.
You said I was the most
Profound and truthful
Person you had ever met.
I wish I could remember
What I ever did
To impress you.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Steven, you were one of the most...interesting friends I've ever had. I wish I could find you again.

My love...

Sometimes, you have me so pissed off
So angry at you that
I could kill you.
Then you do something
So unexpectedly sweet,
That all I can do is
Smile and forgive you.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

On Writing...

Aahh... I saw where a friend of mine had started a blog to create some accountability for his writing. Good idea, mind if I borrow it? (Don't bother answering, I'm going to anyway. LOL)

It's been so long since I've written any poetry, and now that I've started, I can't seem to stop. But, I haven't done much with any other writing in a couple of weeks. So, let's see what I have and what I can accomplish in....say a week.

1. Wilderness - This was supposed to be a short story, but it's grown to over 60,000 words so far and I think I'm about 2/3 done. Problem is, I'm stuck for what to do next. My main character is in jail, charged with murder. The real murderer is still running around free. But the question is, how the hell do I get him out of jail? I think I wrote myself into a corner here. I may have to redo the last 50 or 75 pages...which sucks, cause the writing itself is great.
2. Nightmare - great plot idea (at least I think so), and the writing is some of the best I've ever done. Got about 2,000 words on this one, but I can't quite seem to capture the voice I was writing in...
3. Flashback - I love the premise of this one. I also like the style I was writing in. But I put it down for maybe a little too long and can't seem to pick it back up...a little over 2,000 words.
4. Untitled - 500 words, mediocre writing and no idea where I was going with it. Can you say DELETE?
5. Surviving - almost 3,000 words. I liked the writing, it was good and in a different voice than I usually use. But it was about a wife who didn't know her husband was having an affair with her friend...and it got a little close to home. I may pick it back up eventually, but for now....
6. Outcast - 200 words, nice writing, good voice, but no idea what the direction is. This was one of those things that popped into my head while I was drunk. Shelved for the moment.
7. Untitled - over 1,000 words. Good plot, good voice, good writing. But a little too personal...shelved for the moment.
8. PKJ - Working on a title for this one. Good premise, though I may get in trouble for airing the family's dirty laundry. LOL. Over 4,000 words, great voice and good writing. Similar plot to Nightmare though.
9. Tired - 400 words, like the writing and the voice, but the subject matter is a little...disturbing. Reserving judgement on this one.
10. Arendiwanen - Another working title. Good plot, good voice, love the writing. But again, similar to Nightmare. 5,000 words.

So, here's my working list:

1. Wilderness - 63,000+ words
2. Flashback - 2,000+ words
3. Arendiwanen - 5,000+ words
4. Nightmare - 2,000+ words
5. PKJ - 4,000+ words

Now, let's see what I can do in a week. :D

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Getting Sick

God, how I hate
that stuffy,
dizzy
fever-chill
headache,
that scratchy
itchy
sore throat
feeling,
that achy
hurts everywhere
wish you could die
pain,
that comes the day before
the flu.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

A Bad Night

Dozing....
Sleeping...
Dreaming...
Why am I so cold?
Where's the blanket?
Oh, geez, he's wrapped himself
up like a mummy.
Seriously?
All the blankets?
Come on,
just give me one...
Just a corner?
Don't lay there like a rock.
Roll over;
At least let me have the sheet.
Fine.
I'll get one out of the closet.
There.
Warm...
Cozy...
Dozing...
Sleeping...
Dreaming...
What the...?
Wait a minute.
Where the hell's my pillow?
Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
How many pillows do you need?
Come on,
That one's mine.
You've got two of your own.
Don't cuss me in your
mumbling sleep talk.
Give...
Me...
My...
Pillow...
There!
Finally.
So tired....
Just want to doze...
Sleep...
Dream...
Burning up.
Where did all these blankets come from?
What happened?
You got hot and threw yours
over on me?
Come on.
I need some sleep.
Take your damn covers back.
There.
Now I can doze...
Sleep...
Dream...
Cold again.
Wait a minute.
How did you get my blanket?
And where are yours?
In the floor?
How did they get in the floor?
This is ridiculous.
Fine.
I'll get up;
I'll get your blankets off the floor,
and use them.
I'll just get back in bed...
Oh, come on!
You cannot take up
the entire bed!
Get back...
Over on...
Your side...
Damnit.
That's right.
Lay there and snore...
Fine.
I'll sleep on your side.
I'm just so tired...
I can't wait to doze...
Sleep....
Dream....
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

And that's how the alarm clock got smashed...

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Sadly, this happens about once a week. LOL

The Soccer Mom

Her day started out so beautifully.
She got the children out of bed.
"Brush your teeth and wash your face."
She got them dressed and fed.
She told them to be good at school
And bring home little gold stars.
She gathered kids, books and homework
And put them in the car.
She drove them all to school
And dropped them at the curb.
She kissed their cheeks and smoothed their hair.
"Have a good day," she urged.

She turned the car toward the city
With thoughts of her husband, John.
I don't know the name of the interstate
Or which ramp she got on.
I know she sang along with the radio,
Some sweet song of love gone wrong.
She set the car on cruise control
And hurried right along.

When the truck in front swerved,
She couldn't react in time.
She tried to jerk the wheel around
And I heard her brakes whine.
She didn't have the time
That reaction would require.
And the metal in the road
Bit deep into her tires.
The brakes squealed in outrage
And she cried out in fear.
Her car was doing sixty
When she ran into the pier.
There was a crash like rising thunder.
I heard her cry out a name.
Powerless, I smelled the fumes
And saw the first flicker of flames.
I saw her through the window.
I saw her still awake.
As the fire consumed her body
And fed upon her face.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

This was actually a nightmare of mine and it was one of the worst I've ever had. Because in the dream, I *was* that woman. I'm not sure what made me dream this, but I didn't sleep for three nights after.

Silence

You say I talk to my friends too much
And you not enough,
But I can see their words
And I cannot always hear yours.
You get angry when I laugh at them
And not at your silliness,
But I can read their words easily
When listening to you is hard.
Fix it, you say.
I have tried.
They tell me nothing is wrong.
Don't you see how afraid I am?
Don't you know the silence terrifies me?
And how I dread the day
When music is no more to me
Than words on a page?

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Uncertainty

How do I tell him how I feel?
I'm never sure how my words sound.
He's certainly no poet.
And sometimes he hears only what he wants to.
How do I show him my love?
I'm always worried that he's laughing at me
Without me realizing it.
And sometimes I know that it's true.
He doesn't always get me.
But he tries,
And when he wants to,
He can be the best there is.
But lately,
He doesn't seem to want to try.
Should I make him think there's competition?
No, too dangerous a game.
Should I make him think I'm bored?
He might not even notice.
Should I tell him how I feel?
It'll probably start a fight.
I hate to fight.
I hate to argue.
I always want everyone to like me
To approve of me.
I guess that's why
I hardly ever let myself
Be myself.
Damn, I hate this game.
Why can't we just be in love?
Why does it always have to be a game,
A game that no one can win?
How do I tell him how I feel,
When I'm so confused myself?

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Gidget

My friend is sick today.
And it hurts me so,
To see her suffer
When I feel so well.
She's so miserable,
And I'm so healthy.
She's so sweet.
It's not fair.
And I can't think
Of a single thing
To make her smile.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Pagan Soul

Her light calls to me;
The full moon song carried on the night's wind.
I must sleep....
Her light covers everything,
Making this night as bright as day.
I should sleep...
Her magic falls on the forest outside my window
And I cannot resist her call.
I cannot sleep...
I want to run through the fields,
Singing to this moon,
Singing to the trees.
I want to find the circle in the forest
And build a fire taller than the trees.
I want to dance for her,
I want to sing for her.
I want to give in to the blood
Coursing through my veins.
My blood knows the old songs;
My blood knows the old dances.
My soul cries out
Begging for freedom.
Release me from my chains;
Let me live as I was meant to.
I want to give into her magic;
I want to let her weave a spell around me.
I want to call up the power
I have so long denied.
I want to be myself again.
I want to give myself to you,
And let you fill me with your power.
I want to dance beneath
This magic moon with you.
I want to worship you with my body,
I want to feed you with my soul;
And let the world
Of right and wrong,
Expectations and responsibilities
Melt away
In the fire of our love.

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

Flashbacks

Why is it you start ignoring things
That once meant so much,
And then something happens
To remind you
And suddenly,
That old song is playing
Every time you turn around.

How can you move through life
In such a fog?
Not even realizing
That you're not happy?
And then someone calls
And you see it so clearly
That you want to run away?

How is that you can
Lie to yourself for so long
And never even care?
Then you see something
And the truth shines through.

It's strange the little things
That have such power
To bring down the walls

© 1991-2009 Samantha Greene

I have no idea on this one. It was in a pile with a bunch from 2001. Could be then, could be earlier, could be later. Sadly, I'm bad to write when I'm drunk. Tends to make dating them harder.